Depression: It’s our fault.

As you all know my marriage has come to an end and the Number One contributing factor in this happening is that dirty fuckin word Depression.
In the almost 4 years I’ve been writing this stuff out the number of people who come to me suffering from one form of depression or another has risen exponentially.
I’m talking it was one in 1000 before, but now it’s more like one in 3.

Depression is a pandemic sweeping across the world and we have no one to blame but ourselves.
Why? Because we now live in a world where emotions are bad and being lazy and no longer self motivated to do anything ourselves, we run to Doctors and Governments to do something about it.

No one allows themselves to cry any more, or be angry or hurt.
People, we were given emotions for a reason. They are our release valve. They dump all the toxins in our emotions and psyche and heal us.
But with Fluoride and Artificial Sweeteners, Sugar, Antibiotic filled meats and dairy, the low fat bullshit stripping our brains of the healthy fats we need to coat it and now the medications we take in bucket loads willingly, we have depression when the smallest thing happens.
I bet you no one will have depression when the Cleansing hits and we are all having to fight for tins in the Supermarket lol

Get off your asses and take your Blob Damn life back.
We have an entire Universe full of Conscious love and light out there desperate to teach us the ways of the Universe.
All our loved ones throughout the course of our Evolutionary creation are begging us to listen to what they have to say and what do we do?
We eat cake and watch the Fucking Kardashians.

Also this ‘Labels’ bull shit and the Moral Brigade, these pain in the ass ‘Black Lives matter’ trouble makers and ‘Feminists’ etc…the governments orchestrate these little pockets of sub division so we will run to them to fix it.
Well guess what people? You get the Government you deserve.

They’re coming, and they are bringing tanks and Thought Police. So now you can’t be angry that some cops are out of control because your a Terrorist and if you say anything bad your a Terrorist and threat to the nation you live in.
Even though freedom of speech and expression are in the front of all great nations Declarations or Constitutions.

Remember when we were kids, things were so much less complicated when shit happened.
They are allowed to cry and have tantrums but when your an adult you suddenly need to focus on working and going to University and pay taxes that aren’t even legal.
We hand ourselves over to the Matrix and then wonder why we are unhappy and our souls are crying out for us to be FREE!!!!

People, please, I beg you, STOP allowing yourself the right to have a fuckin emotion. Life is shit sometimes. Its supposed to teach you the lessons YOU asked for before you came here to be you.

We are incredible Vessels of love and light and only a few of us (Empaths) understand this needs to just cry or be worried or whatever.

We have ALL had to rise above shit that when it’s over we have unclenched our butts and breathed a sigh of relief. But life’s issues aren’t the hurdles we think they are. They are stepping stones not hurdles. We place each stone there ourselves.
WE are the masters of our destiny, no God or Deity. US, we are one consciousness. We are ALL one. We are symbiotic and connected by the light in the Universe. This is why we don’t know what is beyond the edge of space because we haven’t finished creating it yet. I’ve seen it. I know how t works. I can step outside all time and see the light and why and how it works because my brian (yes I know I said Brian, watch the animated movie Igor, I LOVE that movie, it is so sweet and I feel like I’m the monster) releases its own DMT it seems without the need for the drug. We all can but mine is just obvious lol

We are ALL supposed to be like me. The way I deal with stress, the way I understand the Universe, the way I leave all the big stuff to fate, my gift is nothing if we are all like it and if everyone was more like me in terms of this gift stuff depression wouldn’t exist.
Anyone can be like me if the want is there to put in the years of dedication and training.

This year should of been the worst of my life. So much has changed. My heart has been broken more times this year than any other in my life and you know how bad my life has been.
Yet I’m the happiest I have EVER been in my entirety of life here as Debbie.
Since I gave over to the fear and allowed myself to focus on following my compass, get it. What I am, what I need to be, what I need to do etc…..to be happy. I found pure light.

And boy am I getting happy. I see only light now. I’m surrounding by spirits hundreds deep, I have the most incredible job. Oh My Blob, my readings I actually enjoy them now because I’m helping those who want direction not answers. So it spreads positivity and hope. Where as before I was always worried I was letting people down. My fear of letting people down made me nervous.

I’m teaching thee most incredibly loyal, gifted, loving students. They all tell me how they followed their gut to find me. (They followed their compass) and of my senior students I can honestly say I have found my family.
Even when I’ve had to go Dark to teach certain lessons these last few days they ALL understand why it had to be done and never judged me and in fact by having their support and permission it illuminated many truths and brought certain people to the light who should never have found it in the first place.

My sons are so clever and funny. They are bat shit crazy like their parents but they are individuals and happy even with all this going on with Mr Ex.
But they embrace my crazy and now my 7 year old is in to Physics. Even has theories of his own we like to discuss.

Mr Ex and I? We are the best of friends and will continue to love and support each other through out all of time. All divorces should be like ours. I’m taking nothing but what is mine, and he will help me with the boys without lawyers getting involved. No drama, just healing.

Everything in life has an opposite, for balance. Without perfect balance nothing can evolve. Left/Right, Up/Down, Light/Dark, Yes/No, Good smells/Bad smells, Love/Hate, Day/Night, Sleep/Wake, Run/Walk, Laugh/Cry etc…..you name it, it will have an opposite. So you have to know that when your depressed because your marriage is over, the good times WILL come. It has to. It’s Universal law of balance. But what is happening with us on earth is there are so many of you suffering from some form of emotional or Spirit blockage that we are now tipping the balance the wrong way. We either go up the ladder to light which is evolution and all knowledge, all time, all creation, everything, or we tip it the other way to dark and de evoling or nothingness. Which everything in the Universe including the dark are trying to avoid.
Nothing wants to go down the wrong part of the Black Hole. I call it The Tornado Effect.

By us not doing anything about our situations we head further and further into the black hole (metaphoric black hole of life I mean this time not the actual black hole like I meant last time).

So how to beat depression?
Honestly? Grow up. Embrace the suck, admit your dramas, get off our medication, stop trying to pass the responsibility for your bad decisions onto other people, own your problems, take responsibility and get off processed garbage. Sugar and Fluoride, MSG, SLF, Sweeteners, all that shit is killing our brains, turn off your Blob Damn TVS and read a book, go for a walk, stop being fed the lies that your not good enough. Do what makes you happy and fuck every body else. You will give love and support where you earn it. Give respect where you get it, love with all of your heart, do what you love and love what you do. Stop working jobs you hate and follow your dream. It’s better to try and be happy than fail at being happy?
Know that you chose this life for the very lessons your running away from. So face them head on.
You ask for this life. The reason your so miserable is your Third self or Highest Self knows it is here to have the Human Experience and by you fighting your compass trying to point north your denying yourself the experience you sent yourself down here to learn.

If you are living a life where you wish you were doing something else then your pointing your dial away from North. Over time that wears heavy on the dial. Now imagine your intuition is the dial and the decisions you make the magnetic force pulling that dial to North. So like a magnets polarity pushing when your put two magnets against each other, your pushing your Soul away from where it was set to be all along.

So everything you do, every thought, every action, every decision, every plan has it’s opposite response. So if you make a positive decision, a positive plan, do something there is also the alternative to it out there. The potential of what could be if you make the wrong decision.
Your gut, your intuition is your compass and no one listens to it but me lol
I’m the only idiot brave enough to listen to every gut feeling and thought BUT I’ve lost 200lbs and found the love of loves because of it. I have an incredible career now and a book coming out and I’m fighting the fight to get to New England (well that area). I’m happier than I’ve ever been and at 43 I now have a 25yr old in love with me hahahahaha (I KNOOOOW RIIIIIGHT?) lol
Bless him the silly boy lol

But I did ALL the things my compass told me to do and my life has changed so dramatically I now welcome the bad shit that happens because the Universal law of Balance dictates that what turns to shit also turns to roses 🙂
That’s why you enjoy the positives in life because it can change in an instant but it’s AAAALLLL based on what you do with what happens next that decides what happens next.

See life as you standing on a pair of skis. One ski is Light, Positive, Evolution of your Spiritual Self, the Other Ski Dark, Negative and De Evolving on a Spiritual level.
Our job while having the human experience is to balance just right on those skis, not too dark, not too light just going at the right speed to have our journey. But soon enough you get the balance just right so your skis go so fast that before you know it your traveling at the speed of what??????? Anyone?………LIGHT!!!
Good Students. I know the 4 that had their hands up immediately already from here lol (see…..Time Traveller lol)
Get it now?
Sort your shit out and watch how fast you get to the light and evolve?
My light is blinding now I’m going so fast.
Many of my students have just gotten on the slopes so I can’t wait till they catch up and they will because my experiences mean I can show them how to avoid the hard stuff. I have the cheats to life lol no having to go through the shit I went through to know what I know.
Some still have the fear but honestly if your that miserable in your life, surely trying to be happy is worth giving it a go because if it doesn’t work you haven’t lost anything and you can say ‘See I told me so’ lol
Nothing found nothing lost right?

You owe this to yourself and your Ancestors to try. Otherwise you’ll be back down for sure.
We are those kinds of nerdy Spirits lol it’s ALL about the Lesson of the Human experience.
That’s why we do it. But we control what happens, when and how. Fight or Flee.
I used to think everything was predestined but it isn’t. We choose it all. Everything, even when we die.

I chose to fight and I’ve been fighting like a bastard these last 12 months Oh My Blob.

Oh and the reason I am anti Black Lives Matter is because I think ALL lives matter. I’d like to see the people protest the Asian Slaves in the textile and sex industry etc….the African Diamond slaves, The Eastern European Orphans, (All Orphans tbh), First Nations, Aboriginals, LGBT, Men, Hispanics, Muslims,Palestinians, Homeless, Gypsies Animals, Women, The Elderly, Black people, Irish, Gingers, Nerds, Handicap, Mentally challenged, even ugly Spiders the Devils Minions, ALL lives matter, I could be here all day,trees, plants, even dark side, all victims in some way, and we allow it to not matter. We all have good and bad versions. Your going to get good Priets and bad ones, Good Teachers and Bad ones, Good Judges and DAs and bad ones, good black/White/Hispanic/Catholic/Muslim/Gay/Straight/Handicapped you get my drift, I could go on and on. But you know what I mean. If you don’t agree that ALL lives matter then your to blame for the state of all of this in this world. Your either a part of the solution or a part of the problem because that’s the balance lol See how it works? lol
See….I told you I wasn’t crazy lol The dead people in my head taught this stuff. Lol
Wait till I do my book called The Science of the Paranormal.

So we are all to blame for this shit. We got what we deserved.
We are living our collective Spiritual Karma.

A handful of people tell us who to hate and we obey. Even though deep down we know it’s wrong.
Immigration…….we ALL come from Immigrants. We ALL came from somewhere. No one will be 100% pure anything.

The trouble isn’t letting someone in from a different country but letting everyone in without checking the moral fibre of the person you let in.
If your there to work and make a life for yourself then come on in. Your going to stimulate the economy, and build infrastructure. If your there for benefits and have nowhere to go then maybe you don’t come in, especially if you can’t read or write.
BUT…..what we should be doing is helping these countries so these poor souls aren’t having to leave in the first place. And we do that by getting rid of Bankers, Government, Sovereignty, Big Business, Pointless Celebrity, Military, Pharmaceutical companies etc….
If we all lived the same way there wouldn’t be any of this shit.

I’d of worked in every country but now if it wasn’t for immigration.
Bastards. Who are we to say no you can’t come my soil? It’s not even OUR soil, it’s Earths and she belongs to ALL of us in the Universe.

We are ALL responsible for each other, when we have the SJWs and Politically Correct, and Moral Brigade getting offended by every little thing we de evolve ourselves faster than war.
War is tragic and brutal and over with eventually. Take your emotions and freedoms and rights of expression away etc…and it poisons us slowly over centuries.

This is why we are on the dark side of the Black Hole and Brethren aren’t.
We are heading towards that black holes corner pocket faster than we can maintain the balance and we all know what happens when a house gets sucked into the wrong part of the Tornado.

So you choose. Life is choice. Be the change you want to see because know one can fix what is wrong in you because only your compass knows where it’s north is.
Deny it and you deny yourself.
So don’t blame anyone else if you don’t listen to yourself. The answer is in you and has been all along.

The question is how much do you want to be happy and live the life your soul asked for?

I was taught this by the dead. I share it with you to show you that the dead are NOTHING to fear. Nor the Dark Side as just these very last days I had to work WITH the Dark Side to resolve a problem surrounding a Student of mine.

You HAVE to know the Dark to know the Light. It is the balance of life.
Don’t be afraid. I’m trying to show you how, if you just listen and trust your instincts your compass finds it’s way to where it is meant to be every time.

The bad stuff happens because it is meant to, but with bad comes good. With good comes bad. You just have to find the balance.
But as I say The Fear of the Paranormal is never as bad as the reality of it and I’m living proof.
Now I just have to be heard a little louder which is why I need to get to America. I know the course of my true destiny lies there.
My compass is set and I can’t fight the magnets pulling me in and to be honest I don’t want to stop it.
Knowing this path is taking me faster to the light and the happier I become the closer I get to it.
So I won’t jump off any time soon.
Light is soooo right. I can’t even begin to tell you.
But I’m gonna try.
I’ve been crossing over so many Spirits I think maybe it might be my thing lol My main purpose, my true gift. I just can relate to them. They trust me to do the right thing.
But more about that later.

We are deigned to self govern
So when we bottle stuff like shaking a bottle of coke eventually it’s going to explode and erupt. It’s the same with emotion.
I admire people that withdraw and mope
or like me I go off and cry
crying is my release
it’s just in how you choose to deal with it comes the hard part
finding the balance
so get angry and punch a pillow but don’t go out and punch a cow or small child
hahaha

Listen to music that you know can change your vibration, go for a walk, hug a tree, bake a cake, play golf, paint, fish (catch and release or for dinner not for sport or the blood lust), whatever it is you have to do to bring calm to your light. Stop stopping yourself from feeling. Put your anger towards something that gets that kenetic energy out of you. Just put it into the right action. Make good choices when wanting to be angry not bad ones. YOU set the balance. YOU. No one else knows your balance but you. No one IS you but you so no one can understand what YOUR balance is.
And this is what I’m teaching you all, this is what my students are doing. Skiing lessons 🙂
And I’m the Ski Instructor called Sven, but it’s a Military grade Ski Slope so I’m the Drill Instructor as well and I’m sorry but my Teacher was right and I apologize to you now Pauline, can you hear me up there? lol I’m so sorry lol You were right you little tiny person. I am tougher than you. You said I’d be a tough teacher and I laughed at you. I told you I’d bake cakes and tuck them in at night lol
I’m hard Mama, Oh My Blob, I’m like Satan with big tits lol
I’m the Satan of the Paranormal Sciences hahaha bloody typical lol
My poor students lol they are tough man, I’ve not had to drop a student in months and boy have I thrown some shit at them lol
It’s an honor to serve with these men’s and women. We are going to war together to change history forever and I couldn’t ask for a better regiment to serve with.
Our galactic brethren are with us, fighting the good fight and the light is starting to shine.
Soon enough if I can do this right, before I die there will be a few hundred thousand less people afraid of death and what happens after and then we can see death as a celebration because they get to go back to the light if they lived the right life while here.
So get it right. Please listen to what I’m saying in these posts. What I want you all to do is try it. Try the way I’m saying to be. Just for a month or a year listen to what I’m saying. It works. I promise you. You wait till you see my weight loss. Once I’m down to my goal weight you wait till you see the change it made all because I listened to the voices in my head lol The dead.
If I’m wrong……well then I just won’t play anymore lol Your on our own. I’m done lol I quit lol

Love and Light
Mama
xoxox

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READINGS

Over the past few months I have been learning, studying and developing a variety of new techniques which I have begun encompassing into a new form of reading.
The main aspect of this new technique is giving the client guidance on how they can achieve their goals and find balance unlike a traditional reading which is just predictive.
This will offer guidance from Spirit in regards to things like career, love, money, mental health etc….
I believe I am the first to offer this kind of reading.

In the course of doing so Spirit will show you the future and you can have with the predictions being far more accurate than me trying to pull them out of the ether.
You will learn more about your journey this way as there will be no fear on my part of getting the connection with Spirit wrong.

The sooner people realize Spirit are conscious energy and not physical beings to describe in detail the better the connection will be.
You will be able to learn so much from them if you just listen to the messages rather than look for evidence they are there.

If your having life issues, depression, worried about anything or just want to connect to Spirit and the Universe please come book a reading and let me show you how to follow your compass to perfect balance and peace in your life.

You get 5 questions $50 £35 but your readings will be done either digitally or written in great detail via email. I also do phone calls as well. Even international ones.
You will NOT be disappointed. I will work my ass off helping guide you with all the knowledge of the Universe behind me.

My students and I are on an incredible journey together and one day soon I’ll have more of me to go around but I want to spread Spirits hot sticky love all over the globe and show people how a reading should be done.
Spirit can change your life. You never need to be unhappy, lost or disconnected again if you listen to Spirit.

Email me at debbiedakiwi@gmail.com if your interested.

I am Psychic Therapy or Spiritual Counseling if you will.

I look forward to walking your journey with you.

Love and Light
Debbie

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My Detox from Death

I’m kind of reluctant to write this post because I’m scared people are going to copy me and end up in hospital.

So you all know I’ve been battling with health issues for the last 5 years. I had meshes put in three times and my body has been rejecting them. I’ve developed a bacteria in my gut which makes me violently ill, gives me fevers and indescribable pain.

Because of this bacteria I have a higher chance of getting stomach cancer and when I’m not vomiting everything I eat, I’m doubled over in pain. I’ve almost lost my life twice because of it and at one point my body was so run down my body contracted Chicken Pox while in hospital and my immune system was cream crackered. I had to go on Immune Boosters for 12 weeks and it was the only thing that gave me strength to go on.

I was put in a High Dependency Unit and put into Quarantine. The only people allowed into the room were the people treating me and two nurses and cleaners who took shifts. People were coming and steering into the window to get a look at the freak in the cordoned off room. I cried for days and it was a most humbling experience.

But while I was in there I got a wee visit from a Spirit nurse. She walked up to my bed in full 3D manifestation and said to me ‘Mrs Black? Good news, next year will be your year so just hang in there a little bit longer, we’re gonna get you out of this’.

Almost 12 months to the day, they did indeed ‘get me out of it’ and I’m going to tell you how. But before I do I’m going to put up a disclaimer.

I will not be held responsible for anyone who copies me and gets ill because if it. What I am doing is on the advice of my Spirits. The best Doctors in the world because I couldn’t rely on the NHS to do their job and fix me.

Every 8-10 weeks I had these bouts that used to put me in hospital for dehydration, pain, and fever. I had an infected seroma that would flare up and give me raging infections. My sister Mihi, who in my opinion is the foremost expert on all things natural and herbal told me about CDS, or Chloride Dioxide Solution.

I did some research and found a supplier in Australia. The Government are trying to ban it saying it is a poison but the Lancet Medical Journal are calling it the ‘Medical find of the Century’. It is curing all sorts of diseases by kind of making you purge from your body all heavy metals and toxins from your system on a molecular level. The trouble I had was that the antibiotics I was being put on, cleared the infection on top of the mesh but not between the meshes. They are microscopic and nothing was getting it inside the mesh.

I took the CDS for 2 weeks. Just a glass in the morning and it was disgusting. It smelt like  swimming pool and actually had no real taste. If you could get past the smell it wasn’t that bad. You only put 7 drops in the water. It stunk to high heaven but it did the trick.

I spent 2 weeks with gut wrenching diarrhea. I mean….I was never off the bowl. But I haven’t had an infection in 2 years now. No Fevers either.

But I still had the guts ache, severe pain, vomiting that would keep me awake all night and dizzying nausea. I’d be kept awake for weeks at a time with excruciating pain and every 4 weeks or so I’d not be able to get out of bed.

One of the biggest illnesses you get with these meshes is a condition called Fibro Mylagia. It is a painful auto immune condition that makes you thoroughly exhausted. Your joints get inflamed and sore and you get something called ‘Restless legs syndrome’ where you can’t keep our legs and feet still. Your constantly feeling the need to move them and it doesn’t matter if your sitting, laying or reclining. I always know when I’m going to have a Fibro attack because 2 weeks before I get a sore neck, jaw, nape, shoulders.

Not just achy sore, it’s literally sore to touch. It feels like your bruised and any slight touch makes it really painful. Even water from the shower on my skin can hurt.

All I want to do is sleep. I can’t eat, I ache all over and many many times I have had to run my home from my bed. My poor babies being sent downstairs to get me bottles of water and having adventures without me. In fact they were so used to me being stuck at home in bed they used to get disappointed if I came with them because they knew it meant we wouldn’t be doing anything fun because I could only walk so far before being in pain.

I was miserable. I just wanted my life back. I ballooned to 360lbs or 25.7 stone. A size 28-30 in clothes because while I wasn’t eating a lot of food, what I was eating wasn’t healthy because it was quick foods, loaded with sugar, fat and carbs. And because I wasn’t exercising I wasn’t burning any of it off.

I told you 6 months ago I had a visit from the Council. They told me I would be needed to work more. That more people would start needing my help and I needed to be prepared. They also said I was coming to the end of my training. My time as a student was coming to an end and when that happens it means you begin a public career.

I told them that was ‘fine as long as they helped me get better and looking a little more presentable. I didn’t want to be out in public looking like someone had inflated me through a valve near my bum lol They said they would be in touch and when they were ready I was to follow their every instruction. And this is the part I take no responsibility for should you follow my diet.

So 4 months ago they came to me with a list of things I was to buy and a list of instructions and guidelines I was not to deviate from.

I was to limit my diet to no more than 800-1000 calories. I was to eliminate white flour, and cows milk from my diet. Cheese was fine as long as it was as low fat as possible.

I could eat as much fruit and meat as I wanted to but seeing as I only eat chicken and the occasional piece of fish it wasn’t really an issue for me.

I was to eliminate sugar completely. No sugar was to be eaten or added to my food. I could only get my sugar from natural sources. Like fruit, raisins and other dehydrated fruits.

I started the no sugar diet first, thinking it would be the hardest to kick and in terms of the effects it had on my body I’d say it was the one thing my body kicked up a fuss about. After 4 days of no sugar, I started to get headaches and while I’ve never had any cravings for the sugar I found myself feeling the need to snack more. In which case I ate Brazil nuts, walnuts and popcorn (cooked by me in a pot with coconut oil)

I didn’t miss sugar or crave it. In fact within 5 days of having no sugar I found I began to sleep better, my skin was looking clear, no redness or puffiness on my face.

I started to drink Sparkling Mineral Water too and for some reason my brain really enjoys it because it tastes sweet. Like Fizzy Pop but it’s just water. I don’t know if the Carbonated part of it tricks my brain into thinking it’s pop but my ex husband and sons now drink it. I sometimes put fresh fruit juice in it so they think they’re having Fizzy Pop lol

After week 2 I felt feckin fantastic. I had so much energy I was exhausting my husband and sons out from all the walking I was doing.

I lost 14lbs in a week.

Then after week two they bought in the diet part.

I also started taking B12 vitamins and within 4 days got the feeling back in my feet and fingers again after 3 years of not feeling them. It really was a miracle. The voices in my head were starting to cure me of things hundreds of Doctors, Surgeons and Specialist didn’t have a clue over.

They would of wasted 10s of thousands if tax payer dollars on not fixing me. They all had an idea of what it could be. And I was misdiagnosed 3 times with Diabetes (which almost killed me while I was pregnant with Train), IBS and Tumors.

So the diet became this.

No more than 800-1000 calories a day.

No butter, no marg. I can only eat low fat, zero sugar olive spread. Which is fine. I like it. My cheese is 50-70% fat free, my cottage cheese is fat free, I even have cheese spread which is fat free. It’s great on my Sesame Seed Ryvita crackers I have for lunch or a snack.

My bread is wholemeal, or Granary. It isn’t big slices but if I have cheese spread and cheese on it for breakfast it’s really very filling. No white flour what so ever.

I was to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner only if I felt hungry.

Some days I skip breakfast but I’ll have a coffee with coconut milk in it and maybe an apple and pear around 10-11am. Coconut milk is what I use for everything I consume. Apart from mash potato but I don’t eat it very often.

For lunch I can have a sandwich with say lettuce, cottage cheese, tomatoe and vegemite for example. Or if I have some left over chicken from dinner I’ll have chicken, cheese and zero fat mayo.

Then dinner. Which is whatever the family eat but if they have pasta or spaghetti or rice I eat wholemeal pasta, brown or basmati rice. My salt, soy sauce and gravy’s are low salt, low sugar. I had some tomatoe sauce the other day that wasn’t low sugar and salt and it was disgusting. I couldn’t eat it if it was on my food.

My taste buds have changed so much. Sugar coats your tongue with a slime that goes away after about 2 weeks and I promise you your taste buds will thank you for eliminating sugar.

Everything you eat tastes soooo much better. A bite of a home made burger or pizza is incredible. In one bite you taste every flavour. Your taste buds single them out one by one and you enjoy every flavour one by one. It has made me want to experiment with my cooking just because I want to see what certain things taste like. Those Quorn burger patties are heavenly in a burger.

Homemade Southern Fried Chicken is next. My Chicken Goujons are to die for.

I’m only allowed to eat if I’m hungry and if I’m peckish I’m only allowed my dried fruit, fruit, nuts and popcorn. I also have ‘Salt your own’ crisps too which are low salt, zero sugar and low fat.

If I have bread for toast I won’t have any more bread for the day. Basically though I eat what I’m told to when I’m told to.

I have a stack of brazil nuts, walnuts, peanuts, cashews, almonds, dehydrated fruit like raisins, cranberries, blueberries, mango, guava, etc….

All my food is grilled, oven baked or cooked in coconut oil. I have found that in doing my Detox from Death with nuts as my source of snackage and cooking my memory has started to return and I’m remembering the names of people and places I had forgotten for decades. Like High School teachers and birthdays etc….

Also the other thing I do is when I wake up before having anything to eat and drink I have a glass of apple cider vinegar. About 4 caps full in a half a glass of water.

My nails and hair are looking shiny and gorgeous, my skin is clear, not puffy, or red any more. It’s taut and smooth. I’ve always been blessed with good skin but now my skin is like it was when I was 17.

I’m full of energy again, my ex husband hasn’t had to take one day off this year for my illnesses. This is coming from a man who lost all of his holiday and sick days for 5 years because of me. He even had to take unpaid leave to help me never once complaining.

Before, everything I did was from bed.  All my house work was done bit by bit leaving the big things like hoovering to my husband who was already working 2 jobs as it was.

Now my house is always spotless because I have the energy to do it all myself.

I am sleeping so much better now. I used to get woken up constantly with pain, of feeling the need to vomit, or the other end sometimes 5-6-7 times a night. I was so inflamed in my gut and organs they would glow in the CT Scans. All my organs were twice the size, engorged from the inflammation.

I used to feel my blood coursing through my veins. Like a torrential river. It burned so much.

In 4 months I have stopped vomiting. Stopped with the gut wrenching excruciating pain that made me feel like I was being stabbed. My guts would make these horrible sounds which always led to me being in agony within a day or two.

In four months, I have lost nearly 60 pounds. Weight loss is a part of Fibro Myalgia but I had nearly 14 stone to lose.

I have gone from a size 28-30 to 14 which means I’m smaller than my pre pregnancy weight. I keep buying clothes in a 22 for some stupid reason and I’ve really had to force myself to buy smaller.

I’m never hungry. Some days all I’ll have is Ryvita crackers with Cottage cheese and some fruit and I’m happy as a lamb.

I’m eating so healthy now that yesterday I stupidly had a piece of Domino’s BBQ chicken pizza and woke up this morning with sore joints and hay fever like symptoms so needless to say I won’t be doing that again.

I have no digestive discomfort. No nausea, I’ve stopped taking ALL of my medication. Oxynorm, Oxicontin, Amytrip, Oramorph, Prochloperazine, ALL gone overnight.

Just my weed, my vitamins and supplements and my protein shakes.

Unfortunately I do still get pain of the ripping tearing adhesion type but once I can manage that I will be in perfect health.

My blood pressure has returned to normal, my hands and feet are no longer swollen and I’m not retaining fluid and get this. I done ZERO exercise for the first 9 months. Apart from walking on the weekends or occasionally as a family we walk to the shop.

Now I walk around 5 miles a day and more on weekends. I work out every day and exercycle every day too and I love every minute of it. I find myself getting annoyed if I can’t exercise.

After 4 months I could no longer stomach the smell of sweeties and I’m am only supposed to be on this Detox of Death for 3 months but I’m enjoying it so much I won’t ever stop. I was on the strict diet for 3 months and then went to the full fat dairy again.

I’ve been testing myself on foods to see if I react to it in any way and so far it seems to be white flour and sugar that are doing the most damage. So I’m avoiding it.

Not once have I had a craving for anything sweet. I miss nothing apart from Ice Cream BUT Iceland’s and Tesco sell this sugar free ice cream that is supposed to taste gorgeous so I’m going to try that.

If I want something sweet at any point I’m only allowed Dark Chocolate with the highest percentage of cocoa in it as possible.

It is incredibly healthy for you and is linked to some incredible medical benefits. Diet sweets or diabetic sweets often have Aspartame or other artificial sweetener in it so I would avoid that shit like the plague. But it has been about 9 months now since I had any type of chocolate. Sugar hurts my guts now. I’m up all night so I’ll never consume it again.

I feel 22 again. I feel so good and my ex husband has been so impressed with what it has done to me. He said I’m the me I was when we were dating.

They seem to know what you can and can’t eat better than even you do. They set my meal plan for the day when I get up so I know what I’m eating.

I actually look forward to eating now and enjoy every bite. I stop when I feel full, even if it’s half a plate. But I can’t stomach as much as I used to. I don’t have to eat more than my 800-1000 calorie allowance. But I can’t go over.

I’ve only been over once and that was last night when I ate the pizza slice and boy did I pay for it.

I keep a journal so I can document all the foods that I’ve noticed a difference with. Bananas have been a bit of a surprise to me. I NEED them. I put them in my protein shakes

I’m so grateful to Spirit. They have saved my life. I’ve never felt this good. And I get to go clothes shopping again. I am starting to dress nice again as opposed to looking 9 months pregnant. And you want to see my new shoes I’ve been buying. Nothing over £20 but I am actually wanting to take pride in my appearance again.

But remember I said Spirit said I was coming to an end of my time as a student? It seems the last lesson is all about me. Working on me and ironing out the last chinks in my armor so to speak.

I’ve unloaded a lot of dead weight in my time on this last lesson.

Letting go of people, thoughts, fears and issues that were holding me back as been so liberating.

I call it the Detox from Death because it was Death (aka Spirit) who put me on the Detox lol they created the meals and menus for me. They tell me what to eat and when. They tell me how to cook it and how to prepare it.

So if you try this detox please don’t hold me responsible if you collapse or get ill. I know my body inside and out and I know Spirit.

This detox won’t work if your not able to talk to Spirit because they give you the recipes and food ideas. They tell you which cereal to buy and which prunes to buy (I put them in my Bran Cereal for flavour because I can’t put sugar in it) sometimes I put in fresh berries or raisins, just like a tablespoon.

I’m eating a lot of brown lol but ya know what? this has been the easiest diet I’ve ever been on. It hasn’t been hard one bit. Not once have I felt like going back to my normal diet. I’m always full and I’ve never felt so alive and when I reach my target weight I promise you I’m going to post a before and after photo.

Oh and one more thing. You HAVE to try fresh percolated coffee with Alpro Coconut Milk. You will never drink normal coffee again. My ex is so impressed he is doing my Detox too. Basically my body is getting not starved but deprived of certain things to kick start itself into normality again and it has worked.

I haven’t been to the Doctor once.

And my gift has grown at an exponential rate.

And I’m so unbelievably happy.

More to be updated with pictures.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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What is a Soul Mate?

I know we have all been in love. We all think we know love, but how do you know when your ‘meant to be’ or if your ‘soul mates’.

By mere definition of the words Soul Mate, it means your destiny is preset to have this person complete your soul. Without them you are without a complete soul. But Soul Mates don’t have to be for marrying or having babies with. Best friends can be soul mates. Siblings can be soul mates.

A Soul Mate relationship is a hard relationship to forge. You genuinely have to work at getting the relationship and maintaining it. Spirit have always told me ‘You have to work hardest for the things you truly deserve’. So if you have someone in your life who you’ve had to fight tooth and nail just to be with, where no matter what has happened in your relationship you can always rely on each other and no person nor situation has ever broken the bond then chances are you have a Soul Mate.

He has broken my heart more than I can count. He has made me cry more than there are clouds in the sky, he has made me feel like I don’t exist, and like he would rather be with anyone but me. But……..no one knows me better than he does.

Sometimes he can make me so angry I want to hit him with a bat and push him into the river lol I know he will say the same of me. But he has NEVER raised a hand to me once. He towers over me. He is a STRONG man. You know I am tall, but he makes me look tiny. My man is built like a brick shit house as my Mum would say lol and while he can get angry at me and want to throw him into a moving bus he has never so much as slammed a door in my face. I however have hurt my wrist just trying to push him out the door.

Without him there is no Me. He looks like a Giant Confused, Tired and mostly Hungry Bear. How could you not want to hug a confused bear? He is so gentle with the boys. He takes them off for adventures so I can rest my tummy. He never once complained about my illness. He just gets on with it and does what needs to be done. Because he knows I would rather be doing anything else other than resting. I trust him with my boys, and my life and would follow him (and have followed him) to the ends of the earth.

His happiness is paramount. He works so hard for his family and never complains about being exhausted from working long days. He makes me laugh longer and harder than anyone else I know. He is so intelligent. I am turned on by his mind. I am a self-confessed Nerd Lover. He is The Artists Anarchist and if you know anything about either of those two groups of people you will know they are not dumb. I can talk with him about well…as you know. Quantum Physics and Meta Physics and Universal Theories, Genetics, Religion, Politics and Philosophy. All in the same day lol and I never get sick of it. It is through being with me that he got an interest in the things he follows. He wanted to understand me and my world.

How many people do you know other than a Soul Mate would search the internet and books stores for research into Unified Theories just so they can understand their wives voices in her head? He never even really believed in any of this until I did my first reading for him as friends. Then once we lived together he saw the real me. The Full Crazy and he embraced my crazy better and faster than anyone else. He saw how happy it made me and how it helped me, he saw how it helped me help others and how it helped me help him. He stopped questioning my sanity quickly and started asking questions instead.

He can be hard work. Because he is an artist he is more dramatic than a gaggle of Drag Queens at a Beauty pageant and just as much hard work. No one is a harsher critic on his work that he is. And he is so amazingly talented. I love his Abstract art and his Impressionist work. He is messy, and always hungry, and can be indecisive. He is a HUGE procrastinator too which drives me insane sometimes because it usually makes more work for me.

But if I get taken over by Spirit, or the Counsel come calling, or I go into a Time Slip in public, he instantly knows what to do. He knows the signs, he knows what to look for. Just like he knows when I hide being in pain or when my sugar levels are low (I sometimes forget to eat). He never had to be taught what to do. He just knew instinctively what to do. Everything he does, if for the best interests of me and our boys. He tells me every day he loves me when we talk on the phone. He trusts me with his life. Literally. He won’t make any decision regarding his life without asking me first because Spirit have always predicted the big stuff and he knows they have never steered him wrong yet. He has risked homelessness and bankruptcy based on what I have predicted for him. How many people do you know would do that? This is a Soul Mate. A Soul Mate lives your life with you. They feel your pain, share you pain and help to heal the pain. Yes he is my Protector too, and yes we have a Telepathic link but Soul Mates will have a Telepathic link. It goes beyond knowing their favourite colour or what their fears are.

A Soul mate is someone who will be there first when something happens, will often know something has happened before anyone else. They have a connection to you from the second you meet. Your born to be soul mates. Your predestined to be as close as you are, just as your predestined to have the spouse/s and children your going to have.

A Soul mate is someone who is the other half of you. You can have a partner who isn’t your Soul mate. A Soul Mate isn’t about sexual attraction or sex. It’s about something far more important. It’s about your Soul. The fundamental foundations of your very Soul or Spirit. They are connected to you Spiritually. Even being kept apart through life’s circumstances doesn’t mean anything to Soul Mates.

You make it happen. You write, Skype, text, Email like it’s no big thing, because you know the other is always going to be there. I know of a couple who claim to be in love, and have been together 2 and a half years, have never met, talked on the phone or written to each other. They don’t even know the others addresses or phone numbers. But one of them is always trying to convince themselves this is a serious relationship when the truth is, if they walked past each other in the street they wouldn’t recognize each other.

People use the term Soul Mate to describe the person they think they love, and are in a relationship with but it is ignorant and makes light of the seriousness of what a Soul Mate is. Relationships come and go, relationships will be mostly forgotten once someone new come along but a Soul mate will have such a great impact on the person they belong to, they are never forgotten. Are usually but not always with you for life and might even be one of a couple of Soul mates you have in your life. A Soul Mate is the best and worst of who you are as a person and while a lot of us are lucky to have relationships with our Soul Mates, I know of a few people who are Best friends who are Soul Mates, and even fought in wars together. If you have a Soul Mate you will know exactly who they are while you read this.

 

You are the first thing I see when I wake up in the morning and the thing I think about most in the day. When I hear the car pull up I get excited. When you randomly kiss or hug me it makes me go all gooey for the rest of the day. Is it even possible to want you more? But I do.

I’m just so blessed that my Soul Mate is my Protector, but some of you will be thinking about a friend or sibling when you read this. Some will be thinking of your own Soul Mate silly antics and having a chuckle. Thinking about the hard times you have shared, the laughter and the tears, the fights and the reconciliations. And if you are, Thank Spirit. Because they were given just for you, you were given just for them. No one will replace them, no one will be better. A Soul mate is yours to love for life, even if your apart. Death or life will always bring you back together. Because as Soul mates your more complete together. If you have lost a Soul Mate, guaranteed they are with you and while they might not love you like a wife, friend, sibling, husband, parent etc…they love you more.

Go share the love. Tell your Soul Mate how much they mean to you. It is next to being a parent, the greatest love you will ever know and not every one will ever know the love of a Soul Mate. So go share the love. Love is the most powerful thing in our Universe and an I Love You goes a long way. No one knows this more than a Soul Mate.

Bub, your my Soul Mate, and My Protector and once my husband. This is why your always so hungry lol Your all these things rolled into one beautiful package. I’m sorry if loving me has been such hard work. I just hope it was worth it lol I know you have high expectations of me and I don’t ever want to let you down.

Love your ex