I have the pleasure of meeting and doing a reading for a very special woman by the name of A. A recently lost B and had contacted me for guidance in coping with Bs passing.
I her A’s permission to submit parts of her reading for this article in the hopes that it will help others understand the way a person feels and prepares to take their own lives.
Below is an exert of the conversation. I’ll mark anything B says with a B before it.
That photo was prophetic. He was definitely telling people he was ready to go.
He’s not proud of what he did though. He’s totally prepared for the consequences.
He was not wired to the concerns of others in his final days. Suicide is selfish. If it wasn’t no one would commit suicide.
He felt rejection, he felt like there was no place for him anywhere in this life. B said ‘you become detached from all reality when you resign yourself to death and you never stop to think about anyone else’.
He said ‘when you first decide to do it you start to think about the consequences it will have on loved ones but the more it feels right the better it feels inside. Like your heading to the light and it doesn’t hurt when you walk towards it’.
By which point he says ‘you stop thinking about others. You become concerned only with how you get to be in that light more’.
B said ‘It hurts less the more you know it’s going to happen. You then turn on auto pilot. You become an empty shell of your former self from then and then your swamped by light like jumping into a beautiful lagoon that is warm like a bath and the second your head goes under the water you instantly realize you jumped too far and now you feel the pain’.
All suicides, expected and decided ALL end with the lessons waiting for them at the other end.
Some are just wired to have their clocks run down and others switch them off with a minutes notice but all of them have to take notice of the time still.
They don’t get to get away with not ticking. Others rely on them keeping time. It balances everything around them all out.
When someone kills themselves who weren’t ticking down from birth it makes everything around their loved ones unbalanced.
It’s just not bad where you go afterwards like everyone thinks. He said ‘it’s like having to go back to school except every classes subject matter is you and your life up to the moment of death’.
You have to understand something too, Spirit know, see, feel, hear everything every time you think of them, speak of them, remember them, feel for them.
And nothing connects you faster than the memories you have of them.
The more you remember them the more they stand before you.
He felt like he was failing as a person. Had no purpose.
Someone tipped that balance for him. He was always teetering on the edge of deep suicidal depression but someone tipped him over.
He knows now that he and he alone was to blame for his death.
He said ‘sometimes you look for an out so you have an excuse and you know better once it’s too late’.
He said to remember him for how he lived not how he died. He was not how he died. He’d always been prone to bouts of depression but he thought he was good at hiding it.
But he is taking responsibility. He said ‘he just basically looked for an excuse to do it and he found the wrong one and he is sorry for that’.
The person who tipped him over doesn’t deserve that.
It doesn’t matter what a person does in their life it is never an excuse to create a torment that will last an eternity therefore making them have to learn lessons as great as yours.
No one has the right to do that to another soul. If your a bad enough person that someone kills themselves then they de evolve, the journey for them is hardest of all. Because they have lived light, they know it’s power and a series of bad decisions in life leads to an after life of darkness. But your talking about serial killers, rapists, bankers etc…
He is healing, this what he is talking about is him reflecting on the impact he had in this world and he’s being introspective as part of his lesson.
Once he is done he will get reborn.
He will choose to come back and try again and make better choices.
There are people out there who have contemplated suicide and he wants to help stop them.
You have too much to lose and so much more to have to gain back, it’s exhausting for something that just wants to get to the light. But they do it anyway because the only way to get to the light is to learn from your mistakes.
Pity or self pity isn’t allowed in the light. Pity is something given not practiced.
They are never miserable or sad, they are determined and encouraged and supported 100% with nothing but love. But they know their actions need to be learned from and accept it fully with nothing but love and light.
9 times out of 10 it is we who keep them here. Our grief, our shock. Thus creating an unbalanced atmosphere.
It’s only usually those who die violently and not instantly after impact that get trapped.
Only in a small number of instances are they not made to learn from it. Where the suicide is forgiven to themselves.
ie Mental Illness, or suicide to save others for example.
He is healing. That’s a good thing because it means he has forgiven himself for his passing and is preparing to move forward from it.
Not without his battle scars though, he knows he’ll NEVER do anything like that again that’s for sure.
THIS POST IS FOR ANYONE WHO HAS LOST A LOVED ONE TO SUICIDE IN THE HOPES YOU WILL FIND COMFORT IN THE KNOWLEDGE THEY DON’T SUFFER BEFORE OR AFTER.
I’m being brutally honest as you can not be politically correct with suicide.
It is a brutally honest why to die.
I do this with nothing but love to my suicidal brothers and sisters and their families as well.
Suicide is fast becoming my speciality subject unfortunately when it used to be the rarest thing I dealt with.
Everyone knows someone and what bothers is the number of males out numbers the females around about 20 to one. It is a far smaller majority of suicides I deal with are female. It’s maybe one in 20.
To those contemplating suicide, there is always a way out of it. Suicide isn’t always the answer. You only drag your journey out when you do for the wrong reasons.
Please, I beg you to know the consequences of your actions before you do them.
I have written many articles about this from the Spirits perspective and its just not worth it.
You don’t go to a bad place and I know I can’t stop you if your hell bent on it, no one can.
I’ll continue to write to you all, helping any way I can all I ask in return are your tomorrows.
I’d like to thank A sincerely for allowing me to share Bs story with you.
I apologize to A for any pain I caused in bringing this pain back to you.
I hope though it helps you heal in time knowing that he has already made a huge impact to anyone who reads this post and finds peace of mind from it.
Your courage and bravery humbles me.
Love and Light