In my many years of seeing and speaking with the dead I have asked them probably over 20,000 questions lol I wanted to know how to make the most of my time here. How to embrace the world and my gift. How to be true to myself without hurting those around me and even more complex questions involving physics and Extra Terrestrial based lessons and just a Bouquet of wonderful, enlightening conversations over the span of 42 years.
But the one conversation I had with them that has stuck out most of all was regarding there own deaths.
When I asked them what they thought about in the days, minutes, seconds before they take their last breathe as that person on this world for all time and they all said, every single one of them said and I am allowed to directly Quote this too ‘I had too many regrets’.
They all said and say ‘Don’t live your death regretting never lived’ Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Life is the rich tapestry you get to create so don’t make it boring’.
I got permission to speak about this but I won’t mention his name though. But 6 months ago a man in his 60’s came to me and said he would like a reading.’ He is one of only a handful of clients I have read for who taught me more than I could ever have taught them and will inspire me for the rest of my natural life. All because he had faith in Spirit and I.
In doing his reading he realized he had found the answer he had longed for, longed to hear for over 27 years.
This man had done everything right. He studied hard, went to College (Uni) got his engineering degree, got a wife and had a house and kids and he retired.
Quite a few years before he was due to retire he lost his beautiful wife. He raised his then Early teen kids by himself and never remarried.
He had a mortgage and made himself a nice living. He could afford a luxurious lifestyle because of his businesses and he paid taxes and sent his kids to college and had them home for Xmas etc…saw them off into their careers and so on and he was miserable in his soul. He loved his life and he loved his family but he had something hidden deep inside him that he could shake and for 27 years he fought it. As he sat in his log cabin out in the Wilderness he longed and dreamed and grieved for this thing he always wanted to do and never had the guts to do it.
All this man wanted to do was see his country and write a book. He longed for that Great American adventure and was so afraid of doing it, it was making him sick.
He went to over 40 Psychics and Mediums who all told him to enjoy the rest of his life at a safe distance. To sit on his money and spread the wealth and be charitable at home because it was safer. I was the only one who told him to do it. Why? Because of what his wife and every other Spirit I asked have been saying to me for years. Which is ‘Do it, don’t live with regrets. make memories now while your alive. When you die you have nothing BUT memories so make them good ones. Don’t waste your life doing what you THINK you should be doing but what you know you should be doing. Open that business you always wanted open. Doing something you love. Getting to make a living out of it is so much more rewarding than working hard to make a fortune. Dreams are easier to make than money and more rewarding when you have them in your hand. Kiss that girl you fancy at school, write a book, publish it yourself and leave them in charity shops. It doesn’t matter if no one publishes it for you, do it yourself. It doesn’t matter if you give them away or sell them on Amazon Kindle. Write the book. Record that album, travel, take classes. Then you can say you did it. Who said ‘It is better to try and fail than never to try at all?’ One regret you’ll never have when you die. When your dead and buried and your stuff is being fought over or sold, it’s not your things people will remember but you. The memory of you. So how do you want people to remember you? The horrible way you died? The sad way you lived? The work you always did? Never being brave enough to step outside the door? Or do you want to be remembered for something else? You get to make a memory for your family now while your living NOW. So make an adventure of your life and write the book as you go. Tell your story now while your still living. An Auto Biography not a Biography. I told him to do it because he never has to worry about getting a meal, he has the money to never go hungry or be cold. His car can be fixed or sold to buy a new one without it costing him money he could never afford. He had that advantage. Even though he would have many nights under the stairs in the flat bed of his truck and he would work to pay for his meal for the reward of knowing kindness and that sort of charity I think Americans should be proud of. No one does ‘Community Spirit like Americans.’ They know the meaning of the word Charity, Kindness and true Spiritual worth. He would see it, know it, be moved by it and in his leaving one small town for the next he plans on giving money away to causes he meets along the way.
Well I got an email 4 weeks ago to say he had put his stuff in storage and sold his house on the beach and his apartment in the city, he’s kept the Cabin because he wants to die there in about 60 years because he was off in the truck and were off having the start of the Great American adventure.
I made him promise to keep in touch with me. He has stepped over that hurdle and conquered his fear of losing control of his life. The energy I got from his last email fed me for 3 days in energy. He was a blessing and an honour to meet and get to know and I know that man, when his time is up, will slip away at Peace with the world and at Peace with his life.
Close your eyes and imagine your dying. Your laying in your bed looking back on your life and what you enjoyed and didn’t. What you learned, who you loved and who loved you back etc…..what are your regrets?
Well I’ve decided I will no longer live with regrets. I’m going to complete as many things on my Bucket List as I can before I pop my clogs. It started with me making apologizes to people I know I’ve hurt in the past. Mostly those fights you have with loved ones and you said things you wished you’d never said type stuff.
I’ve also decided to try more foods. Stop being afraid to try new flavours. The world is a plethora of cultures and dishes out there at our disposal and I only ever eat the chicken. Now I will only ever eat just chicken, I haven’t eaten Beef or Sheep in 17 years. I stopped liking the taste of it and now it just tastes gross. But I eat enough chicken to not require B12 injections lol and it’s hard for me because I’m allergic to egg and can’t stand mushrooms and they are staple foods for vegetarians lol Chicken, vege, pasta etc….come in many forms and I’m gonna try them all.
But I want to talk to you all because so many of you come to me with dreams and being too afraid to fulfill them.
My dear client I will call Jack said to me before he set off on his journey ‘I need to Thank you Debbie, you have me so much and I feel like a teenager again. I haven’t felt this good in a long time. I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders and I have you to Thank’. I said to him ‘Jack, don’t Thank me, the reason you saw 40 Psychics and stopped with me, isn’t because I’m better, it is because I gave you the right answer and you would of kept going until you found one who said Yes, so it’s nothing to do with me, I’m just the lucky one who got to say it and see you do it.’
I want to tell you some of the things our loved ones have been telling me about their regrets upon their dying moments.
The most common regret is without a doubt ‘I wish I had kids’ is the most common thing I hear. So many people realized their legacy stops with them. They went and made money and saw the world and now there is no one to mourn them in that special way.
The next most common thing I hear is ‘I should of never worked so much. I thought I was making a good life for my family so I could enjoy them later but when later came I realized I’d missed out on so much my kids hardly knew me and I hardly knew them. One Spirit said to me ‘I made over a 80 million dollars for my company and yet I never knew my daughters best friends name or what my Son’s favourite sport was and when I died they had nothing to share at my Eulogy so my Personal Assistant did it. I missed every single Anniversary and Birthday and I hated myself for it. I kept telling myself ‘when you retire you can make up for it all’. ‘Then I die from working myself to death and never got to make it up to my family. I am still counting the regrets and I’ve been dead how long? (2 years was the answer).
The next most common thing is ‘I should of said I’m sorry to (………….).
Then it would be ‘I wish I’d written that book or opened a business’. So many people wish to start business and were too afraid in case it didn’t work and they lose a steady job. So what………ya know? If you have a dream to have a wee book store or bakery or Dog Groomer or whatever it is. Big or Small. Do it. Then you have no regrets when you die. You’ll always know fail or succeed…..you tried. And my Mother always said ‘God loves a trier’.
One lady said to me ‘I was married 62 years to the love of my life. And 2 weeks before we married I had the chance to have a one night stand with the most Beautiful American Soldier I had ever seen. His skin was like hot chocolate and he was an Angel to look at. He made my eyes adore him lustfully and I never did it. My husband was the love of my life and every day with him as my best friend and lover was a gift from God. But I never knew what it was like to know lust. Passion. That rip your clothes off, rush of hormones, throw you on the floor ravage you unbridled passion. My husband was an incredible man and a wonderful Father and Grand Father and I regret nothing to do with him. But I regret everything to do with this Tall Drink of Chocolate and if I could go back in time I would of drank him long and slow, taking in every tasty morsel. lol True Story lol
Don’t be afraid of the things you want to do. If it brings you joy even for a moment, the memory of that joy will last beyond your life time and then it is worth it. Don’t let your last thought be ‘If only’ but instead make it ‘Remember when’.
I intend on remembering decades full. Starting from 15 years ago.